Memo to Horses:

--When your stall is being cleaned, please don't go through the wheelbarrow
& take out bits of wet, dirty hay. You have nice clean hay to eat & no matter
how precious that stuff is to you, it's got to go.

--No matter how entertaining it may be to a horse to knock over a full
wheelbarrow & then watch the resulting swearing & re-filling, it is NOT
considered entertainment by the human.


--Jumping out into the barn aisle over the wheelbarrow will NOT get
you an audition for the USET. I don't care how tightly you can fold your
knees, this is not the time or the place.


--It is not necessary to hide your manure so I have to sift through every
inch of bedding in search of buried treasure. You're not a cat & your stall is not
a giant litter box.


--By the same token, the water bucket is not a commode, and the automatic waterer
does not flush. Are we clear on that?


--The "lah-di-dah" attitude, "Drop it anywhere, I have a maid who comes in & takes
care of that," is not helpful.


--Neat freaks who manure only in one corner of the stall will get extra grooming
time & treats.


--There will be no more unauthorized barn parties after lights out.
When I come in, in the morning and find bleary-eyed horses, straw all
over the aisle, manure half-way up the walls and even the rats have hangovers,
do you think I don't know what went on last night?


Please take this memo to heart, or learn how to clean up your own rooms!


The Management