Heaven & Horses

A man was riding his horse along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered the wreck, and that the horse had been in the wreck also. He wondered where the road was leading them.
After a while they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, the stone wall was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. Standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother of pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold.
He and the horse walked toward the gate, and as he got closer he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough he called out:
"Excuse me, where are we?"
This is heaven, sir," the man answered.
"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.
"Of course, sir. Come right in and I'll have some ice water brought right up."
The man gestured, and the gate began to open.
"Can my horse come in too?" the traveler asked.
"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept horses."
The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going. After another long ride, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road that led through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.
"Excuse me" he called to the reader, "Do you have any water?"
"Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there." The man pointed to a place that couldn't be seen from outside the gate. "Come on in."
"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the horse.
"There's a trough and a cup at the pump."
They went through the gate and, sure enough, there was an old fashioned hand pump. The traveler pumped fresh water into the trough then took a long drink himself. When they were full, he and the horse walked back toward the man, who was standing by then, waiting for them.
"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.
"This is heaven," was the answer.
"Well, that's confusing," the traveler said, "the man down the road said that was heaven, too."
"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."
"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"
"No. I can see how you might think so, but we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their horses behind."