Is there anything cuter...

than donkey baby ears!

A nun and her donkey

A nun wanted to enter a racehorse into a race. But then she realized that they cost way too much, so instead, she bought a donkey.
The next day, she enters it into a contest and it comes in third.
The headlines read, ''Nun's Ass Chokes.''
The next day, she entered it in another competition and this time it came in first.
The headlines were, ''Nun's Ass Wins Grand Prize.''
The following day, the owner scratched the donkey from the race.
The headlines read, ''Booker Scratches Nun's Ass.''
And on the next day, the nun sold the donkey for a really cheap price.
The headlines were ''Nun Sells Her Ass for $5.''


(variation of Pastor's Ass :))

What do you call a donkey....

What do you call a donkey with one leg? A wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye? A winky wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love? A bonky winky wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love while breaking wind? A stinky bonky winky wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes? A honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes and playing piano? A plinky plonky honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes, playing piano and driving a truck? Bloody talented!

A Boy, a Man and a Donkey

An old man, a boy & a donkey were going
to town. The boy rode on the donkey &
the old man walked. As they went along
they passed some people who remarked
it was a shame the old man was walking
& the boy was riding. The man & boy
thought maybe the critics were right,
so they changed positions.


Later, they passed some people that remarked,
"What a shame, he makes that little boy walk."
They then decided they both
would walk! Soon they passed some
more people who thought they were
stupid to walk when they had a decent
donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.

Now they passed some people that
shamed them by saying how awful to put
such a load on a poor donkey.
The boy & man said they were
probably right, so they decided
to carry the donkey. As
they crossed the bridge, they lost
their grip on the animal & he fell
into the river and drowned.


The moral of the story?


If you try to please everyone, you might as well...


Kiss your ass good-bye.

Have A Nice Day &
Be Careful With Your Donkey

The Pastor's Ass

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the
Race again, and it won again.

The local paper read:

PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered
The pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read:

BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get
Rid of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline
The next day:

NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so
She sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:

NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back
The donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the paper read:

NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is . . . Being concerned about public opinion
Can bring you much grief and misery . .
Even shorten your life.

So be yourself and enjoy life.

Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier
And live longer!